Q&A-VIRGINITY BREAK-UP *update*
1:27 AM Posted by MS.NOVA
"I just got into a HUGE argument with my boyfriend. It's over. The catch is, I lost my virginity to him 4 days ago!! Ahhhh! I'm so mad at myself for being manipulated! But at the time it was real and I didn't regret it. I'm so confused and can't stop beating myself up. I feel like he took everything I had to offer, my power, it's gone.
How do I move forward from this?
*update*
The boyfriend has RE-surfaced, apologized and claims he "never wanted to hurt her". To keep it interesting, her EX man has now risen from the Castle of Grayskull and wants her back! 2 for 1!
As always, this is REAL life! Help a sister out!
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May 9, 2010 at 10:32 PM
Jeez...virginity is a word that I *gulp* haven't heard in awhile. So you do it, trouble in paradise causes him to bail (weak), he comes back and drags the ex's with him?
I'm sure you're super confused right now and that's all the more reason to take your time before taking any next steps. Sleeping with someone for the first time is a big deal and for the FIRST first time...well, i hope it was special even though where you are now sucks.
I always say, "whatever the reason, the outcome remains the same". By that i mean, regardless of the rationale for him bailing on you (you later explained it was a tweet he didn't like. lame.) the fact remains that you're hurt and disappointed and the trust that i'm assuming took time to build has been pissed away. you aren't a jerk for that. only acting on info given.
the ex is one for a reason. move forward - not back. if the apology is sincere, then maybe you can work it out, but from experience, i've learned that if a guy or anyone close for that matter, is quick to bail over the small stuff, you KNOW he won't be there when it really matters. As always, this guy is your choice and who he is does say something about where you're at in life.
give it time girl. you just stepped into the big leagues. from this point on, it only gets rougher.
*tight older sister bear hug*
: )
nova