ADVICE: 10 LIFE LESSONS, 1ST 30 YEARS
11:31 AM Posted by MS.NOVA
Wouldnt it be great to have someone tell you what to do in this life? How to thrive, how to grow and how to get over the B.S thats out of your control? These are the reasons I hang out with people over 50. These are the reasons I have more then one mentor. And for every nugget of info I gather, these are the reasons I pass it along.
We hear the saying "life is short" and in hindsight, it is. But in the process, in between the thrilling first times and mundane routines, LIFE IS LONG. Life is too long to suffer, to fake it, to stay mad. Life is too long to not go for it, to never know, to regret. Life is long. For that reason, I'm passing along some gems that will hopefully help you in your travels.
~nova
Life Lesson #1 – Let it go.
Anger is never just anger. Anger is a cover up for fear, hurt, or disappointment. I can’t tell you the number of days I stressed myself out in my 20’s because I was angry at another person and did not want to forgive them. I literally made myself sick over it. The ironic thing about anger is that the joke is on the angry person. When your angry, it hurts you more because you have to spend your precious time and energy holding on to negative energy. Sadly, that negative energy often blocks the positive energy from coming into your life. So let it go so that you can let that positive light in.
Appreciate the person that you're angry with and learn to live with them the way they are. If someone is constantly upsetting you, appreciate the fact that you are strong enough to disassociate yourself from them. You don't need to stick around!
Life Lesson #2 – It’s really not about you.
When loved ones, co-workers, or even strangers say and do hurtful things, many times it is really not about you. People in this world have some serious issues. And, because they don’t deal with their issues, they project those issues onto you. The mother who thinks she is the worst mom will project and tell another mom how bad their kid is. The teen who thinks she is ugly will project and make fun of another teen. The boss who can’t manage his team will try to micromanage your work. So the next time someone does something hurtful to you, remember two things, they act like that towards other people as well, and it’s not about you!!
Life Lesson #3 – Others have gone through the same problems that you have today.
This is one I am still working on because I am a pretty private person. But I have to believe that when you go through things, one of the main reasons is to help others at one point and time through the same obstacle. The problem is that everyone wants to put on the mask that their life is grand, secretly hiding away any perfections. If no one knows your true journey, they can’t seek you out for help. It’s not an easy thing to do; it’s not like your Uncle Joe shouts out to everyone ‘Hey Everyone, I’m in foreclosure, now let’s eat.’ BUT, if he did, he would attract others that have been through the same experience, and could change a life for the better.
Life Lesson #4 – Enjoy it now.
As I look back at my last 29 years of life, there were so many special moments that came and went. I wish I would of sat back and enjoyed the moments more. Absorb the good times because they are the first things you forget.
Life Lesson #5 – Power of Persistence
There is something about the power of daily focused effort that seems to be a common theme in successful people. It’s the difference between ball players and NBA players, the difference between a writer and an author. While everyone else is watching TV the ‘persisters’ are making daily deposits towards the life of their dreams. Are you? When I look back, the times that I felt most accomplished were when I applied daily effort towards a goal and achieved it.
Life Lesson #6 – I get it now when people talk about having passion as a requirement for excellence.
If you want to excel as a fashion designer, working towards that goal should generally win over other other distractions. When presented with the opportunity to watch TV or hang out with friends instead of working to, if you constantly choose those distractions over working on fashion, you must consider that fashion is not your passion. I am not saying that you can't relax, but I'm saying that before you choose a life goal or a 'passion', be sure it's something that you, in your heart, really enjoy and love doing.
Life Lesson #7 – Relationships can be your greatest teacher.
I feel that everyone should do a lessons learned exercise after each relationship AND after every couple of years in a marriage. Each relationship is a reflection of yourself (whether good or bad). Subconsciously it’s a reflection of our deepest insecurities and needs. And if you really take the time to reflect the good or bad times, it is a window into your soul. Taking the time to review your past will be time well spent.
Life Lesson #8– Don’t sleep on the power of the internet
There are thousands upon thousands of people making a good amount of money online. The BEST thing about online business is that is has no face. So you can no longer say your being judged by your race, background, lack of a degree, etc. The internet levels the playing field. Quality content speaks louder than your religion, skin color, etc. Start looking into the power of it today.
Life Lesson #9 – Don’t be a“put off’ person.
I spent many years putting off things because I was waiting for the situation to get better or for 'something' to happen first. News Flash – I bet you can think of a hundred reasons to keep living how you are today and not changing; SOMETHING will always be in the way or be a reason to delay. Don’t put off your happiness. If you can do something that makes you happy today, without ruining the lives of others, then do it.
Life Lesson #10 (a la Nova)- Decide.
You have to commit at some point. To a relationship, career, a hair color, to what to have for dinner, decisions need to be made. It can be tough to trust yourself enough to know what is best for you, I get that. Part of building your self esteem comes with 'going with your gut". Make the choice and stick to it. When you don't know what you want, know what you don't want. That can help weed things out. If you get guidance, fantastic, but there WILL come a time where you have to rely on you.
November 18, 2010 at 1:01 PM
Good advice, Nova. Keep up the great work!
December 1, 2010 at 11:02 AM
Great post. Good advice to live by. Definitely sharing.
December 1, 2010 at 11:03 AM
Great post. Good advice to live by. I am definitely sharing.